In a previous column, I observed that “the presidency is ...
a Superman’s job. Nobody should be given — or trusted with — that
much power and responsibility. Nobody can possibly handle it.
“By abandoning our Constitution, in which the legislative branch
is supreme, we have permitted the executive branch to assume a centrality
it was never meant to have. The president is now said to be our ‘leader.’ He’s
expected to provide governance, protection, economic expertise, geopolitical
cunning, and inspiration, among other things; and of course he also
has to have a talent for raising money and winning elections.
“Rare is the man who can master even one of these disparate,
unrelated, almost miscellaneous skills. Requiring all of them is like
asking a single individual to excel at playing the harpsichord, logical
theory, standup comedy, chess, and pole-vaulting.”
This, of course, raises the natural question, Why, then, am I running
for the presidency? Am I arrogant enough to believe I possess all these
Not at all. Some people find me cocky, but at least I’m humble
enough to admit I’m mortal: aging, slowing down, with thinning
hair and thickening waistline. I’m incapable of ruling the world.
Elect me, and you’ll at least get a president who knows his limitations.
As for raising money and winning elections, well, let me just check
the coffers here ... nope, still empty. Actually, I haven’t asked
for campaign donations. I’m not planning to cross the continent
seeking votes, giving speeches, shaking hands, kissing babies. I’m
planning to campaign on the cheap, right here at my keyboard, and let
the Internet work its magic. Either people will get the message and
write in my name, or they won’t.
Not surprisingly, the liberal media are ignoring my campaign. So are
the conservative media, which is not surprising either, since they
don’t want conservatives to know there is actually a presidential
candidate who takes the U.S. Constitution seriously, even when it interferes
with the right-wing agenda of making war all over the place.
Which brings me to my campaign promise: as president, I will veto
any act of Congress I deem unconstitutional; I will impound any funds
Congress appropriates for unconstitutional purposes; and I will refuse
to enforce any Federal law on the books if it isn’t authorized
by the Constitution. I will ask Congress to repeal most existing Federal
laws and spending programs.
Faulty decisions of the U.S. Supreme Court will also be unenforced.
In fact, no Federal law will be enforced in the former Confederate
States of America, since I will recognize the right of those states
to secede from the Union and consider the Lincoln administration’s
denial of their sovereignty grossly unconstitutional. I will abide
by the Declaration of Independence, which declares that all the states “are,
and of Right ought to be, Free and Independent States.”
All this will guarantee my swift impeachment and removal from the
presidency, since Congress will surely regard keeping my oath to uphold
the Constitution as chief among “high crimes and misdemeanors.” But
I can always run again in 2008, 2012, and so forth.
In the unlikely event that I am allowed to serve out my term, what
will be my economic policy? Since I don’t have the infinite foresight
socialist planning and “running the economy” require, I
will try to see that every American is permitted to spend his own money
as he sees fit. My “policy” will simply be to respect all
Foreign policy? Since I regard virtually all existing foreign governments
as forming an axis of evil, I will avoid engagement with all of them.
I will seek peace and friendly commerce with all countries; if they
choose to make war with each other, the United States will remain aloof.
Such a peace policy, now absurdly labeled “isolationism,” was
commended by George Washington and Thomas Jefferson.
Civil rights? I will try to restore one of the most basic of them:
the right to associate, or to refuse to associate, with any person.
Compulsory association, racial favoritism, and restrictions on the
use of property aren’t “civil rights.”
Adherence to these simple principles won’t put much of a strain
on my meager abilities. It seems to me the only way an honest man can
exercise the awesome power and responsibility of the presidency.
Copyright © 2012 by the Fitzgerald
Griffin Foundation. All rights reserved. This column was published originally
by Griffin Internet Syndicate on January 2, 2003.
Joe Sobran was an author and a syndicated columnist. See bio
and archives of some of his columns.
Watch Sobran's last TV appearance on YouTube.
Learn how to get a tape of his last speech
during the FGF Tribute to Joe Sobran in December 2009.
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